gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
