I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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