Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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