Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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