worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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