i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
