Tell her she can't have a vagina
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I could make wine with my vomit
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize