My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
