You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
