We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
