Porn is love you can see.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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