I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
