took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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