I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
id be glad to
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
