you mean i was at the winter classic?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
