Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize