69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
