It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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