when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
