I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
