Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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