YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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