I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I accidentally had phone sex last night
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
