i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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