the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
