i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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