So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
