Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
