Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
