You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
