at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
