I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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