Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
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