I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
