Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
