I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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