barbara walters just said penis...
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
