She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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