I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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