didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
