Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
