yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
