you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
