i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
