if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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