The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
