I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Randomize
