I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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