I CAN MOONWALK!
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize