And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
